Are Men Threatened by Funny Women?

There is a thought out there that women are just not funny. As a recovering stand-up comedian I found that many people, especially men almost dared me to make them laugh. They were sitting in the front row of a comedy club with their arms folded, almost saying, "So you think you are funny? I will decide that!" Research came out last year from the scientific journal "Evolution and Human Behavior." And it shows that men, are in fact, threatened by women's humor.

"Men see being funny as a male thing," explained Dr, Rod Martin, who led the project. Hundreds of men and women in their twenties were questioned. Asked if they found a sense of humor to be attractive in women, most men said yes. But when they were asked if they would want to be with a woman who cracked jokes herself, the answer was a resounding NO!

"When forced to choose between humor production and humor appreciation in potential partners, women valued humor production, whereas men valued receptivity to their own humor," said Dr. Martin.

More than half the men who took part in the survey revealed that a witty woman was not what they were looking for in partner. Dr. Martin said the findings suggested that men see themselves as the ones who should be delivering the lines and feel threatened by humorous women.

This study helps me understand the reluctance of the male members in my audience to laugh at my humor. Dr. Martin, who did the study and who is a psychologist at the University of Western Ontario, says the research may shed light on the failure of female stand-ups who struggle to impress some male audiences.

"One of the reasons why men don't life female comedians may be that humor is seen as a masculine thing," he said.

One of Britain's funniest females, Meera Syai, who co-wrote the starred in the BBC comedy show, "Goodness Gracious Me," said: "The idea that men are more interested in having an audience rather than sharing banter doesn't really surprise me. Women see men with a sense of humor is a mark or intelligence. Many men don't really want to be the recipient of a cutting remark in public that will make them look small or stupid."

Comedy definitely mirrors the culture, says comedian Kelley Lynn, who is also an adjunct professor who teaches a comedy class at Adelphi University, in Garden City, N.Y. She says she is amazed at the differences between her male and female students. "The boys just seem to come in with all this confidence, whether their material is funny or not. Whereas the girls come in and say, 'Is this funny?' Almost always the material is just as funny, if not more so, but the girls lack the confidence to deliver it with conviction. There will continue to be progress for woman in the world of comedy as the world changes, but it may take generations."

Certain roles have been acceptable for women since the rise of the mass media: the sexy vamp (think of Mae West), or the ditsy klutz (everyone from Carole Lombard to Lucille Ball and Debra Messing). "These roles aren't threatening to men, " says actress Jennifer Coolidge who has made a career of crafting cunning klutzy air headed females. She adds, "They play into men's stereotypes of women as sexpots or stupid."

Witness the recent column in Vanity Fair, which declared "Women Aren't Funny" (written by Christopher Hitchens) And despite the fact that his ABC comedy employed numerous funny women, comic Drew Carey says the prejudices are real. "It's not so much that women aren't funny, as that men don't want them to be funny. Comedy is about aggression and confrontation and power. As a culture we just don't allow women to do all that stuff."

All of this just goes to show that men are threatened by funny women. And I say, Too Bad! And get over it!

I want to leave you with some jokes:

My parents had a typical Catholic wedding. My father was a repressed homosexual and my mother was sedated.

How do you know if it's time to wash the dishes and clean your house? Look inside your pants. If you find a penis in there, it's not time.

Never trust a man with testicles.

And a Jana Ruth, because that's my name, joke.

Men may still rule the world, but can they fake orgasms?

Material taken from: "Why Men Don't Fancy Funny Women...because it scares the poor dear." by Roger Dobson in "The Independent" August 18, 2007 and "Are Women Allowed to be Funny," by Gloria Goodale in "The Christian Science Monitor," February 2, 2007

Jana Ruth
Author of "Laugh and Live Happier: P.L.A.Y.S. for Life
http://www.janaruth.biz
http://www.laughandlivehappier.com
http://www.onewomanslaughter.blogspot.com

Plant Joy

I saw this phrase on my co-worker's door and I thought why can't we plant joy? We plant hate, and blame, and anger, and fear? Why not joy? Someone once told me that FEAR stood for F-false, E-evidence, A-appearing, R-real.

I believe that is true. We create our lives. We think about fear, we feel fear, and than we act in fear. Our thoughts, create our feeling, which create our actions, and behaviors, which finally create our lives. We are much more powerful than we know.

So how do we go about planting joy? I have made a list below.

1. Think joyful thoughts
2. Look for joy
3. Surround yourself with positive and joyful people
4. Be more like a child
5. Look for ways to plant joy
6. Commit to living a joyful life
7. Laugh as many times a day as possible
8. Be in the present
9. Be grateful for what you have
10 Forgive others and yourself

Think what a great world it would be if everyone spend a portion of each day planting joy?

Jana Ruth
Author of Laugh and Live Happier: P.L.A.Y.S. for Life
www.janaruth.biz
www.laughandlivehappier.com
www.onewomanslaughter.blogspot.om

I see Idiots, I see Idiots, Everywhere!

Idiot in the dictionary is a stupid or foolish person. Well, lately I have been seeing and attracting many people that fit under that category into my life. What worries me is that I totally believe that we are mirrors for each other. So if I am seeing and experiencing many idiot people, what does that say about me? It says that like everyone else I am human and at times I am stupid and foolish. I am idiot! What upsets me is that in this day and age idiots seem to be rewarded.

To me, unfortunately, too many idiots are in power. It seems that the only way to get power is to be an idiot. The biggest example is the present administration. I feel that this county is currently being led by idiots. Because the tone of a family, organization, or government is set by the leader, it seems that idiots are now in fashion.

As a much younger more naive person I believed that people in positions of power, were the most qualified, intelligent, and best people for their positions. Now, I believe that unfortunately it is the opposite. Most people in power are not the best, they just happened to know people, and in many cases other idiots.

I realize that people hire like people, which explains why idiots keep hiring idiots. What can one do to stop this tend? The only reasonable, non serving in prison answer, I think, is to keep your sense of humor and laugh.

My philosophy is that life is funny, and people are even funnier. I have to laugh at life and the idiots or I would be very depressed. What is the most funny to me is the fact that many idiots don't even know that they are idiots.

Most of the time these idiots are people that take themselves way too seriously, and can't laugh at themselves. They view life as a competition to see who has the most toys, not realizing that life could be much more fun, healthful, and joyful for us all.

Daniel Goleman in his book, "Social Intelligence," points out that we are much more connected with each other, than originally thought, and that idiots can literally make us sick. From the book, "Studies in Sweden of workers at different levels and in the United Kingdom among civil servants show that people in the lower positions in an organization are four times more likely to develop cardiovascular disease than those in the top rungs, who don't have to put up with the whims of bosses such as themselves. Workers who feel unfairly criticised, or whose boss will not listen to their problems, have a rate of coronary heart disease 30 percent higher than those who feel treated fairly."

So not only do we have to put up with idiots but their actions can even make us sick. What can we do? Below are my suggestions for combating idiots.

Ideas for Combating Idiots

1. Acknowledge that they are everywhere, so you aren't surprised.
2. Laugh at them. If you can't laugh in their face, laugh behind their back.
3. Remind yourself that you can't control idiots or totally keep them out of your life, but you can choose how to respond to them.
4. Realize that deep down they are unhappy, fearful, and sad people, and have some empathy for them.
5. Refuse to be recruited into their fold. Don't become like them. Don't give up your power. No job, or relationship is worth it.
6. Continue to love and take care of yourself.
7. Surround yourself with positive, support people.
8. Change your paradigm and work on seeing them as capable, intelligent people and not idiots (this is the most challenging)

Good luck and maybe once I stop seeing myself as an idiot at times, I will stop seeing other people as idiots. Anything is possible.

Jana Ruth
Author of "Laugh and Live Happier: P.L.A.Y.S. for Life
www.janaruth.biz
www.laughandlivehappier.com
www.onewomanslaughter.blogspot.com